Review - The Human Centipede

The Human Centipede is a film that gives new meaning to the phrase “tongue in cheek” . . .

. . . okay, I can’t rightfully take credit for that line as I totally pilfered it from an IMDB forum but I couldn’t think of a better way to articulate the feelings that The Human Centipede elicited in me . . . dan-1207 really seems to get me . . .

Back to the movie though – it is set in Germany and you begin the film with Doctor Heiter (Dieter Laser) on the prowl for his next victim as he lovingly strokes a picture of his dogs. His dogs, by the way are attached mouth to anus. If you were unsure what the movie was about to t his point, you pretty much know now – and really, if you didn’t already, shame upon you!

Those of you that know me probably understand (or at least accept) my love of these types of cheesy horror/comedies. This one will definitely remain near and dear to my heart for a long time to come. Between “my sweet three-dog”, the crude drawings of the elaborate conjoining operation and Katsuro’s (Akihiro Kitamura) dogged refusal to perform tricks for the good doctor this film really tickled my funny bone, but at the same time it also truly frightened me. I mean if we believe that all fiction is based at least partly in truth, The Human Centipede is a terrifying glimpse at what could be in someone’s deranged mind. Of course the fact that hubby runs around calling me “my sweet three-Millie” when he is unhappy with me might add to my trepidation just a bit.

There are all of the typical signs in this film that should tip off our victims, Jenny and Lindsay (Ashlynn Yennie and Ashley C. Williams) that things are not going to go well for them. Their car breaks down, a dirty old man speaking German verbally assaults them and they get lost in the woods in the pouring rain trying to find help. But I think the biggest clue has to be when your German surgeon host who separates conjoined twins tells you he hates humans and then goes ballistic when you spill your water. I’m just saying, clues are clues and you should always listen to that inner tingle telling you things are not right in your world.

Once they are in their bind, Lindsay learns quickly a hard lesson about pissing a German doctor off – it is something that you just do not want to do. The operation actually happens pretty early on in the film and it is very difficult to watch how the gruesome threesome starts to navigate in their new form.

Dieter Laser gives a believable performance as an eccentric, strictly controlled mad scientist, Ashlynn Yennie and Ashley C. Williams play the parts of the ditzy party girls turned terror filled science projects to a T and Akihiro Kitamura portrays his strength and pride in such a way that I really found myself respecting him even with the two ditzy party girls dragging from his backside. And I haven’t even mentioned Detectives Voller and Kranz (Peter Blankenstein and Andreas Leupold) – I’ll just let you discover them on your own.

Suffice it to say, The Human Centipede is a definite recommend from me. Although I will warn, that even for me, this film was extremely hard to watch at times.

Directed by
Tom Six

Writing credits
(in alphabetical order)
written by
Tom Six

Cast (in credits order) Dieter Laser ... Doctor Heiter
Ashley C. Williams ... Lindsay
Ashlynn Yennie ... Jenny
Akihiro Kitamura ... Katsuro
Andreas Leupold ... Detective Kranz
Peter Blankenstein ... Detective Voller